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Here it is coming roaring around the corner—Valentine's Day. A day that is supposed to celebrate love, instead often comes packed with big pressure, high expectations, and disappointment.
Did you get her the right flowers? The right present? Do you have anyone to share the day with?
I do believe I have the answer to all that. A Valentine's present for yourself! I'm lucky because mine (and the inspiration for this blog entry) came in the mail yesterday. It's a new book by one of my favorite authors, Daniel Gottlieb. It's called, Learning from the Heart: Lessons on Living, Loving, and Listening.
I shouldn't be surprised that Dan sucked me in from the first moment I cracked open the book. Couldn't get out of the parking lot as I soaked in the wisdom of this incredible man. More on Dan in a moment. First a peek at the kind of thoughts Dan shares and challenges you to think about. This one really knocked my socks off:
It seems as if the more we let go, the more we experience love. Love is beyond everything else—anxiety, desire, hope, resentment. Love is openhearted, demands nothing, and needs nothing. It is more likely to visit when our desires are quiet, when we don't need or want much, and when we accept that everything we love is not permanent but is with us at this very moment.
That one quote alone had me doing a relationship inventory right there in the parking lot. As I thought about people I love I asked myself if I was really feeling love toward them or actually feeling anxious, wanting something from them, hoping they would be something they are not, and resenting who they are. That's some big thinking to do in the parking lot! My brain was fully engaged, the car heater was going full blast and the seat warmer was on "high." It was all systems go!
All this from the mind of a man who has spent almost 30 years in a wheelchair as a quadriplegic. He's been in a wheelchair since a freak car accident back in 1979. That's when Dan says he became an "outsider among us," observing what unites and divides us, getting at the core of the human spirit.
He's really so much more than a guy in a wheelchair. He's a psychologist, NPR talk show host, columnist, author, and proud grandfather. He's also very funny. I first fell for him with his book, Letters to Sam, where he writes insightful, heartfelt letters to his grandson. That's another suggestion for a Valentine's Gift for you or any other heart you want to touch.
So, go ahead, buy flowers that wilt, or candy that goes straight to the thighs, my preference is a Valentine's gift that goes straight to the heart.
One little thing to mention---Learning from the Heart doesn't come out until March 1st. But you can pre-order it on Amazon.com. Trust me, it's worth the wait. What the heck—if you're really feeling love, I would get Letters to Sam AND Learning from the Heart. Sam will here in time for Valentine's and then as you're wrapping that up and feeling Dan Gottlieb with drawl pangs, Learning will be on your doorstep.
Oh, and talk about the gift that keeps on giving and loving--100% of Dan's royalties will go to children's health organizations and charities.
I love this guy!
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