That Mood Of Mine That Drives My Husband Crazy

Why my husband isn't happy I'm happy

Funny thing is I had no idea this was a problem

As marital disagreements go,

     This was one I wasn’t expecting.

     It popped up on a typical weekend day for Husband and me, sitting side by side at our dining room table.

     I was puttering away adding uplifting and positive news stories to my website.

     Husband was busy creating our next travel adventure.

Here’s an example of the over-the-top type of trips Husband, aka, MilesHusband, likes to plan.

     “We might be going around the world on Emirates Airlines First Class,” he suggested, as he did the math with his kajillion of frequent flyer miles.

     “Sounds great,” I replied, barely looking up.

     “Vietnam and Cambodia are serious possibilities,” he changed course.

     “Super,” I responded.

     “Or we might just scrap planes all together, load up the dog and head to a marsh on the coast of South Carolina.”

     “She would love that,” I said. “We’ve never done a road trip with her.”

     This was, if I remember correctly, about the moment he had it with me.

     “Forget it,” he threw up his arms. “We’re not going anywhere.”

     This complete change of direction and mood did get me to finally look up.

     What was he so angry about?

     “You like everything. Everything is good,” he said as if he had discovered I spent our life savings.

     “They all do sound good,” I insisted.

     “You’re always happy. You’re happy just sitting in that chair.”

     Hard to fight that.

     He was right.

     I am generally a pretty happy person.

Yes, even just sitting in a chair.

     I just didn’t know this was a problem.

     Until this particular moment.

     “And the problem is?” I asked.

     “The problem is happy. I don’t want happy. I want passionate. I want you so excited about a trip that you’re counting down the moments until we walk out the door.”

     This has me thinking, Dear Reader.

     Is Husband right?

“Is happy a problem?”

     I’m the classic middle child.

     Been happy and keeping people happy my whole life.

     I tend to find happy with what I have.

     It works for me.

     Incredible highs and lows do not.

     Is Husband trying to make me something I’m not?

     Or is he an even better choice than I realized when I met him almost 9 years ago?

     “I don’t want a wife who just goes along to keep a marriage humming. Don’t take a trip just to make me happy.  I want to know where you really want to go. What you really want to do. Until you do, we’re not going anywhere.”

     Which is where we are, as I file this column.

     Home.

     Sitting at the dining room table.

     Which, as I shared, is where I’m pretty happy.

     And,

     And,

     A little uncomfortable.

     I’m supposed to dig deep and be really honest with myself,

     And,

     With him.

     How very, well,

     Married.

     This introspection might be a place I don’t want to go.

     Is happy the goal?

     Or is it the seductive sedative that loosens our clasp on our real dreams and deepest desires?

     I’d love your take, Dear Reader.

     Drop me a line.

     Give your two cents in the Comments section below.

     That would make me,

     Well,

     So very happy.

If you like this story, you might like my latest book,

“Hope Possible: A Network News Anchor’s Thoughts On Losing Her Job, Finding Love, A New Career, And My Dog, Always My Dog.”

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That Mood Of Mine That Drives My Husband Crazy

by Daryn time to read: 4 min
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